Ever notice whenever making big life transformations or transitions, you experience resistance in the least likely places. I love my family and friends. However, whenever I was making big changes in my life such as starting a business or changing my diet… I experienced the most resistance from family and friends. It’s as if the crab mentality came out in full force. Crab mentality or crabs in a bucket refers to a way of thinking, “if I can’t have it, neither can you.” Individual crabs can easily escape from the bucket, but are pulled down by the rest of the crabs ensuring their inevitable demise.
Check out this week’s video where I share 5 tips how to handle resistance from your family & friends while continuing living your fullest life.
1. You and ONLY you can give yourself Permission Release yourself and let go of the need for family and friends to give you permission or validation to make any changes in your life or do anything in your life for that matter. Claiming and owning your new identity is an inside job.
It’s releasing the mold of how you want your family and friends to support you. They don’t have to understand you the way you understand yourself. Let them support and love you the best way they can. Let the truth set you free.
2. Set New Boundaries Setting new boundaries is necessary to breaking old patterns of toxic people and situations. It gives you an opportunity to have open and honest dialogues about your dreams, the future you envision, what you will and won’t tolerate.
Yes, a dialogue is a two way street. Be open to hearing constructive feedback that helps you grow and develop even if it’s not always the easiest to hear. However, if it tears you down or makes you feel small, stop the conversation and pull yourself out of the trenches!
The resistance dissipates if you move purposely into the uncertainty without trying to force your ideas on anyone else. Sometimes direct confrontation is the only way to clear the air.
Insecurities are loud. Confidence is silent.
3. Consistency is King/Queen Being consistent in your words and actions is the best antidote to solidify new boundaries and align you with your highest integrity. Your family and friends are watching and listening to you. Having one foot in and one foot out only makes them question you and not take you seriously.
Consistency is the result of having both feet in and complete commitment. When your actions, habits, disciplines are consistent, this increases your credibility and ensures you achieve your desired vision and transformation.
4. Find The Gifts Your thoughts become things. Your outer world is a mere reflection of your inner world. Look for the hidden gems within the struggles and challenges. Look for the lessons and you will discover the gift of gratitude, compassion, forgiveness and acceptance.
Inspiration, motivation, confidence, inner strength and will power make their presence known when you are tested and challenged. Let the resistance serve you as the fuel to create the change and transformation you desire.
Let your passions, what you stand for, the impact you desire to make, and the legacy you want to leave behind emerge from the depths to shine light on darkness. Let your commitment to your mission and meaning lead the way.
5. Create supportive community As a creator, it’s your responsibility to create a community of support around you. Surround yourself with people who inspire you, motivate you, encourage you, believe in you, bring out the best in you, stretch and nudge you to grow.
The most painful experience is losing yourself by trying to be someone else and living life according to their way. Honoring yourself to create change also holds a space for family and friends to adjust to your change.
Meet resistance with openness, love and compassion. You set yourself free when you don’t expect others to behave in a way you want. Release yourself forevermore, know that you alone control your happiness, and follow your path and mission unapologetically.
Always keep radiating your beautiful light to the world living life with passion, purpose and meaning.